Log in

No account? Create an account
Zero Tolerance [entries|friends|calendar]
Irish Vigilante

[ website | T.N.G ]
[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

Act XI: A New Start [27 Aug 2004|03:24pm]
[ mood | bored ]



I have made a new name, and I will start using that now. The LJ link is here.


4 comments|post comment

+===+ [26 Aug 2004|11:47pm]
[ mood | content ]

I might change my LJ user name...tell me

ja oder nein?

If you don't care, tell me, if you agree, tell me, if you don't agree, tell me. TELL ME!


3 comments|post comment

Act IV: Sick In Mind [25 Aug 2004|12:45pm]
[ mood | scared ]

A few things.

-I will not go after girls,
-I will not like girls,
-I will not want to have a girlfriend.
-If one happens to come along, and it works, then maybe.
-I hate poison ivy
-Everytime I actually dream, it scares me
-I dislike dreaming
-1 to 4, has nothing to do with 6 and 7.

2 comments|post comment

Act IX: Poor Man's Medical Kit [24 Aug 2004|09:16am]
[ mood | devious ]

I love bleach...

2 comments|post comment

Act XVII: Gun to their head. [23 Aug 2004|11:53pm]
So yeah, I woke up, at 2PM today? I went to bed at like 10 or 11 this morning... ha. SO yeah... I was heh, I did the dishes and stuff. Took a shower and what not. Then my dad came home... and yeah, did more SHIT for him because he feels the need to make up little task that make no sense half the time. And even though I do them, he finds the need still to give me shit for not doing enough around the house. Meh Whatever. so Brad came to get me so we could go play baseball.
I like playing baseball, its good. I think I/WE should do stuff like that more often. Its good exercise and its something to do.

I think I am gonna grow my hair out abit, because I havn't had it longish in awhile...yeah.
Last time it was sorta long was end of last summer? meh
we will see...

But I downloaded the new Rammstein video/song Amerika... its hot

I can't wait for their new CD to come out, most of everyone I know but for assholes like them. But whatever. But it will come sooner or later.

i'm gonna go
post comment

Act XXIII: Slave to Evil [23 Aug 2004|03:07am]
[ mood | blah ]

There Was A Time I Thought,
The Mind Would Force The Body.
There Was A Time I Thought,
The Mind Would Force The Soul.
But Then I Went Evil.
But Then I Went Mad.
Evil Is Ruling,
Over My Existence.

3 comments|post comment

Act III: Eventful Days [23 Aug 2004|12:35am]
[ mood | content ]

Okay, so yesterday... I get home at like 2AM, then I wake up at 7AM after going to bed... I dunno when. but yeah, so I go to school to get the parking pass. So we are there for awhile.... Get our pass for school thats coming up. I grabbed this guy's ass, that everyone thinks is hot. Girls that is... lol He just turns and goes ' there it is... ' and smiled. It was rather funny. Hes a pretty cool guy, but yeah, so I talked to Brad Williams and Sacha abit cause thats why I went over there. I just felt like surprising the other kid. So then, we go to McDonalds and had breakfast. Then we went to my house, and watched TOP DOG, with Chuck Norris... oh, my god... so gay, my sides started hurting cause it was so damn lame, and i was laughing so damn hard.
anyways, we did a buttload of shit before noon. It was crazy. Then we went to Brad's and watched Belly of the Beast, which is a Steven Seagal movie... my sides, so painful... I laughed, so damn hard.

Then Brett left, and went home for abit... Brad fell asleep... then I fell asleep. I went in the other room. We were out like Poland... anyways, for three hours. So then we wake up, and we go to my house and get something to eat, then go back to Brad's after renting The Professional. So we go back to Brad's and just sit around and what not. Then Derek came over, and we watched some of Terminator 3 on TV. Then Brett came over, and we popped in The Professional. Its such a good movie, i think they enjoyed it some. haha

then I went home and yeah, woke up today and just, kinda .. yeah lazy. took a shower, sat on my ass. Went to McDonalds with Brett. Played black hawk down. Then later on, Brad contacted me, and we went to play Baseball. which was fun as hell, and i got exercise...lol
i want to play more often, i need to get more exercise... yeah
then Derek and I went to my house, Derek ate some ribs and I was too full from water and soda to eat. So we hung out abit, and then brad and brett came over. and we stood outside abit. Then they all left, and I came in. Took out the trash and sat at the computer and what not.

I bleached my hand today, after I cut it open. i had some type of rash or something of that sort on it. I also did it to a section of my chest. I dunno what it is, but its killing it. :) so I have electrical tape wrapped around my hand with cotton balls on the wound. It looks kinda cool, lol. i think so atleast. but, the skin is dead...lol its funny looking. but meh, i hope it gets better.

I am gonna go watch a movie and stay up abit... maybe go to bed.

8 comments|post comment

Act XI: Die Laughing [21 Aug 2004|04:05am]

ImmortalEmbraces: OH MY GOD
ImmortalEmbraces: PARKER
ImmortalEmbraces: at Rocky
AnIrishVigilante: ew
AnIrishVigilante: no
AnIrishVigilante: don't send me a picture of him
ImmortalEmbraces: I was wearing this corset
ImmortalEmbraces: and he ripped it down and took a picture! >:o
AnIrishVigilante: :-P
AnIrishVigilante: I'm watching Predator...
AnIrishVigilante: I have a sudden urge to go outside and do tactical training...
ImmortalEmbraces: lol
ImmortalEmbraces: I just tell you there's a picture of my boob floating around somewhere, and you tell me you're watching predator.
AnIrishVigilante: ...
AnIrishVigilante: Soooo!?
ImmortalEmbraces: lol
3 comments|post comment

Act XVI: Guns and cocktails [21 Aug 2004|02:23am]
[ mood | Here ]

Hmm, so last night I spent the night at Derek's with Brett and Brad, and Derek's friend Brendan ( whom is a cool guy if I must say so. ). So we played Manhung for awhile, the game was called off, but Brendan and I had teamed up so we kept going on with it just for practice. We only set off one sensor light. Ha, it was fun. So then we went to Wendy's... And the other running crew was there. Goings, Andrew, Sascha and Savva. Goings hates Brett so it kinda broke into two groups... hmm, whatever though. So we were there for a good time. Then we went to 7-11 and got slurpees... YES! That was awesome, I love slurpees... Anyways, so we went back to Derek's and then we went for a walk. Brett stayed and talked to someone online and he joined us about an hour or so later. We talked to Brett about something important and that had been on our minds for abit I guess... But we were spinning around on one of those big circle things... yeah, i got sick abit. We pretty much just chilled. It was nice.
So we went back to Derek's and watched TV for abit and fell asleep. Brett, Brad and myself stayed up for abit talking about stupid stuff and laughing. We were all overly tired and we found everything funny at that point and time. So then I was the last to fall asleep, atleast I think so. Brett was snoring and I kinda tilted his head, and he stopped for awhile...lol, until he rolled over. But meh.

So I wake up, and Brendan and Brett had left at differnt times. Brad was awake and really bored. So we left and Derek was out like a light still. So I get home... and I take a shower, and change and all that good stuff...
I sat around for awhile... and I fell asleep thinking of what I could do... So I woke up, and I called Brad... He was out at dinner, I felt bad cause I forgot to check the time.
So I sat around for awhile, and then played DF: Black Hawk Down. Then Brad got online, and he was going over to Stephanie's house cause Karen( Brad's g-f )was sleeping over. So I guess, he invited me... I dunno, but he asked I guess, so he says. I believe him though. I wanted to get out of the house really bad... So I said sure. So we go over, and we stood outside for abit. Colleen was over at Stephanie's too. So then we went inside, then in the back and Brad and I talked and they were on the trampolean. And I have to wake up at 8am tomorrow to go to the parking passes thing for school. Lame... I was suppose to get 50 bucks... But its on really short notice... and I dunno how I can get 50 bucks out of no where... I have like 17 bucks,... but thats for seeing AvP tomorrow. Ha. Ohwell, I'll figure something out. So I hope...
But, so then we went in the basement...and most of it was small talk... and ackward silences... so thats how I felt atleast. And then all the inside jokes... that the males and females had... Brad and I joked about how Andrew and I act gay and stuff like such. And, I have no clue what the hell they were talking about. So my dad called... and I had to go home. About 20 minutes later, we start to leave. So then I got home... yeah, and here I am.

I hopefully, no, I will see AvP tomorrow. I know it sucks... Its going to, the director is an asshole. But ohwell, I am a big fan, I have most of all the books, a few comics, and the movies and games. Even some goddamn toys. So I need to go see it. Haha.
I invited Helena to meet me if she wants at the movies, etc etc. She doesn't have to, but she said she wants to meet up with me, so opertune time.
I couldn't go see it today cause everyone pretty much was busy and my mom didn't wanna drive me and my dad was home. So, it was a no go. Ohwell, tomorrow, rather...today... It will happen. AHAHAHAHAHAHA, speaking of which. I need to go to bed.
Gonna fall asleep watching Predator 2.

post comment

Act XXIV: Glimmer at the stage of death. [19 Aug 2004|05:04am]
[ mood | cranky ]

Hmm...So I've been laying in bed for the past... fuckin' I dunno how many hours. Usually I don't get up and post after doing so. I wait to pass out. But, its not coming.

While listening to this song... I am a fool. But who isn't these days? I guess, atleast I will admit it.

I try to admit all my flaws. And I try to accept them...

I am a fool
I fall easily in the name of love
I am over protective
I care too much
I am full of hate
Sometimes I can have a narrow view on things
I am often lazy
Leading me to be out of shape
I can procrastinate
I have bad spelling
I have bad speech
If I turn violent, its hard to turn it off
I can be stubborn
I am often negative... The glass is half empty... 80% of the time I am... i guess
I give up easily on things
I can be an asshole
I can be crude
I can be cruel
I can be overly nice
I can give too much
I can give too little
I often wait for the wrong time
I say the wrong things sometimes
I can be an overly polite asshole
Vengence breeds in my heart
When I want something, its always just out of reach

and the list goes on... But I will stop so I don't repeat myself...
if anyone has anything to add, or to disagree on... tell me so.

11 comments|post comment

We got Skinnys, 9 O'Clock [18 Aug 2004|10:56pm]
[ mood | content ]

Hmm, so I woke up today... Yeah, gotta start off with that.
I went shopping with my dad... I got Delta Force: Black Hawk Down....
my god, its hot.
But I didn't get to play it until after I did yard work. I got to use the chainsaw for awhile, then I had to drag brances down into the woods. It was a good work out, and fun cause I used the chainsaw. So, then Brett comes over, and I finish up...
Delta Force time...
But I am angry, I can not find my Black Hawk Down DVD, I dunno where it is... rah!
Ohwell, the game is hot shit, I am gonna leave out part of the day, and just leave it with
Black Hawk Down is a hawt game.

post comment

Running on empty. [17 Aug 2004|11:33pm]
[ mood | Brute ]

So, I havn't been to sleep in abit... I need to tonight, I hope I do. But, Savva and Mike came to pick me up. We went to go play paintball, we cruised around abit. Then we went to a car dealership and Sascha showed up. I went with Sascha to go pick up Andrew. We got there, and then Savva and Mike pull up in a new truck... So then they take it back cause they were test driving it. So we just stood around, looking like terrorist in a suburban area...ha. Atleast Sascha and I, for awhile Andrew looked like a hippy from the 60s. Haha. So then, Savva and Mike show up. And it takes... 10 minutes for Savva to get ready. So we go down in the power lines area and go to play paintball. It was fun, Mike walked around taking pictures and keeping time. Savva was off somewhere, and I was crawling around in the tall grass towards Sascha and Andrew. Sascha air got messed up and so I had to give him mine to use so we could play. So we went down to this other area. It was rather swamp like, and damp. Ha, imagine a swamp area being damp... But, so Savva and I are on one side, Andrew and Sascha are on the other. We are suppose to advance towards each other, so we do. I crawled about, hmmm fuck if I know how far. But it was far. On my belly in mud, it was so badass... But, so I was about 15-20 feet away from where Sascha and Andrew were. But Savva kept shooting at me because he was spraying the entire area. So I didn't move as much because I didn't wanna give my position away. After awhile, and about 6 more feet advanced for me in prone. Savva hit Sascha and they decided to say game over. I crawled back abit and got out of the bushes about 20 feet further than I was so they didn't know I was so close... Hehe...
So I came home after Sascha dropped me off, I am pretty sure he was ready to go to sleep, Ha.
But, so I got a drink and got on for abit after taking my BDUs off. I took a shower and checked for ticks and other bugs. Not a one, ha.
I must say... After playing paintball... or doing such activities... it puts me in a mood... 'horny' I guess you could say, where I could get a woman and just, have a fun ol' time... haha, I usually don't say things like that, but I will admit, it does. Ohwell, ha.

I am gonna play Ghost Recon for abit.

1 comment|post comment

What lays inside of me? [17 Aug 2004|09:33am]
[ mood | indescribable ]

So, yesterday... I watched Mary( my little sister.), but to top it off. I woke up, after having three extreme dreams. One was moderate... It was your, so to say... Average ' falling in love dream ', can't do it in real life... Might as well dream it? Heh. So I have two other dreams, which I am thinking I will write two short stories about, or atleast jot them down, because... they were so vivid. I woke up after the one, thinking that I had been shot in the chest, I held my hand up expecting to have blood on my hands. I felt as if I had been shot, sick thing is, now that I think about it... Where I would have been shot in the one dream, on my back, it hurt, its still abit sore... The exit wound so to say... I JUST NOW, thought of that... Hmm. But, anyways. I watched Mary until about 5.PM, and then my dad came home. Brett came over, and we went to Derek's. Then we went to get food, and picked up Andrew. Then we went back to Derek's after we got Andrew more food. And then we went to Brad's house. We stayed there until about 8 or 9 something, then we went to my house and I got my stuff and then we went back to Brad's and we stayed up all night... We were in the hot tub for a lot of the night.

We watched Predator. I must say... Predator is one of my favorite movies of all time. I didn't realize how good it was until I re-watched it, for what, the 300th time? Haha. But it is an amazing movie. I am not so excited to see the new one because... Well the guy that directed it is a douche. But anyways, great movie.

So then we went back out into the hot tub, and we talked. A lot, I described my dreams to them,... and I am not sure how they responded... They just kinda looked at me like, ' wow ' type thing. Andrew might remember more, or comment on this when he reads it. But, yeah... Then, for along time now, I've been thinking I havn't had dreams, I guess I have been just repressing them, I don't sleep often, because my dreams are not happy, they havn't been happy for along time now... Often, my dreams are of me, dying. Its always the ' wake up when you die ', sometimes, I see myself dead... and what happens after I die. I am not sure how to think of this all, and what to feel. But I guess its why I am so 'unhappy', and angry. And often feeling 'sad'. But, I guess its better than what I use to have, I use to dream about the one I use to love dying. It was a dream, that I would get a lot, and for the first time I told someone about it. And, it was one of those things, where I dreamed, and no matter what I did, the person died. I could have the dream a thousand times, at a differnt place, with differnt events. But it'd end up the same way each time. They would die. I guess I prefer to see myself die than someone I care about dying. Often, I have dreams about me 'fighting', in a battle or in a fire-fight. And I get shot, or killed in some manner. Not even heroic or 'good' so to say. In one, that I remembered, I was ran over by a tank... Its too long to explain right now because this post is going on pretty long. But yeah... And if it wasn't a vivid dream, then I would have a dream about me being killed, or, I guess. Demons.... How these 'dreams' occured, I dunno, I dunno why they happen. But... Its never, a story line, or even semi-plotted. Its like, staring into the darkness, and just sudden flashes of something horrid pop up and go. They come and go throughout the night and I toss and turn and what not and I don't get sleep. I often lay in bed at night, just... thinking. Or, I guess fearing to sleep, but not letting myself know that. I do not know. But, I often dream, where its so in depth, that I can feel, I can smell... I can be there. I don't remember many dreams feeling so real... Its like tripping, so it seems... But while I lay in my bed with my eyes closed.

I doubt, I fucking doubt, seeing myself being killed, has to do with sexual stuff like Frued says, or however you spell his fucking lame-ass name. I am not in the mood to get his name right. I highly doubt that me being shot in the head by a 7.62mm sniper round has to deal with me getting laid by some chick or something. You can over analyze it, and turn it into something sexual... But, thats if you wanna be a perverted fuck. You can turn anything into something perverted. Urgh... Anyways, I got side tracked... Haha. But, it was a very interesting night. I do not know what to think of things right now...

All I know, is I wanna get some of these things:

-Another pair of East German Jack boots. ( So I have one pair for play, and one for professional use... haha )
-A differnt pair of military suspenders.
-Flakvest. -Some new knives.
-Thigh holster ( just for show. )
-A new cell phone.
haha, I had more... But I kinda forgot them over time... Meh, ohwell.

I think I am gonna go watch a movie, or lay and listen to music. Maybe even go watch cartoons with my sister after I fix her something to eat. I need to pay more attention to her, I feel I have been niglecting her too much, even though shes a brat to me now because shes at the age of. ' I will tell mom and dad, even if you didn't do anything wrong. Because you are not the boss of me. ' type deal.

Ohwell. Whatever.


3 comments|post comment

Whirlpool of Flames [15 Aug 2004|10:14pm]
[ mood | content ]

I woke up, I took a shower. I made lunch for myself and my sister. I then fell asleep watching TV with her. And then I woke up when my dad came home. I did chores, and what not. Then Brad came and got me, then we went to his house for abit, and then Brett came over. We went to Applebees. I met 3 of Derek's friends there, I alread knew one sorta. Then we sat and talked abit and ate. Then we left, and went to Brad's house. Then I went home. Hmm, fantastic day... I lacked much motivation.

I was thinking today... If my life, decides not to go anywhere... If I don't get into college, or after college even.
I think, I will join the military, I do not know which branch... But hmm. Or I will move to Europe... And become a mercenary.
My ideas on what to do later in life could change, I could fall in love and decide I don't wanna do that because of, yeah. You get me? Ha... Meh.
we shall see.

post comment

Valiant times. [15 Aug 2004|02:48am]
[ mood | calm ]

So today, I sat on my ass after I woke up at like 10 or so... I took a shower and got dressed. I just sat on my bed for about 15 minutes. I then got on my computer, and not many people were talking so I read websites and listened to my jams...ha.
Later on, I had to do some work around the house, and then Brett came over. Brett and I moved an old freezer out of the house after my father and I moved it out of the basement and I cleaned it. So then, after we loaded it into my dad's truck, Brett and I ate dinner at my house and then we went to the mall to look for a new scally cap for myself. And Brett would get my old one. Well, no luck what so ever. They had fake ass 'im in the scene', scene of what, i do not know... but they were lame. So we walked around a bit, looked in EBX and what not. Then we went back to my house, Brett played played some PS2 and I played with my knives... I dunno why, but I did. Then Brett went home, and I was talking to some people online. I was being a dick sorta, but it wasn't overly bad... so I hope. I quickly got out of that mood, so I think. But I feel bad for kind of being an asshole. But, then someone asked me to read their poems, if i wanted. So I did, but that was later after they got offline. SO I did that, and now I am sitting here writing this and listening to music. I think I will actually go to sleep early.
so, later.

But I must say, this is some of the most beautiful music I have ever heard, in along time. I don't think many people would agree with me. But it is just, it makes me feel good, even if its about the destruction of man kind and things like that. It flows and sounds, just, so beautiful to me. Ohwell. I like it, thats all that matters.

3 comments|post comment

[14 Aug 2004|05:52pm]
[ mood | blah ]

So, yeah... my day... I have been sitting on my ass. I cleaned my room pretty well. I am now sorting my desk, but I took a break cause I don't feel like doing it right now cause I will have nothing to do later. So I think.

I took a picture of my New Boots, yeah, their hot. I found out they are East German Jack boots, hot hot.

I have been listening to a lot of Puissance, they are awesome... yeah...

I'll get bored later. and write about my fun times, sitting here.

post comment

Thexy Boots [13 Aug 2004|05:55pm]
[ mood | relaxed ]

Okay, so I got a new pair of boots. A pair of jack boots... 26 bucks, all leather, but for the soles. The inside of the soles, in the boot are leather, but the outside sole is rubber. They are hot, I hope to update this again with pictures of me in them, or just them. I am not sure if they are East German, Russian, REPRO German WWII boots or what. I don't care... They are hot, yeah, thats right, I said it.

I came to my grandmothers today, because my great uncle and aunt are over. I could have rebeled, and went to hang out with my friends, but I can do that later tonight if I really want to do so. I got only a few hours of sleep, we had a fuckin' fantastic time last night.
I am glad I was over hanging out with the guys, because I told someone how I felt about them, only to an extent, because I didn't wanna go over board or anything and sound like a fruit case. But, they didn't feel the same way about me, atleast that is what they say. That is okay, because I can live with that. They are a beautiful person, in and out I think. I am glad they didn't lie, and just tell me they do, or something to not make me feel bad. The whole, I lie because I am showing mercy stuff. And I can live with just being friends with them.
I suppose I should just stay the protectorate, thats seems to be what I do best... Haha, sooner or later I will find someone for me, I hope so atelast. But we will see.
But, as I was saying, if I wasn't with my friends, then I probably would have felt really shitty at home by myself, seeing how I was in a bad mood anyways. So, if I didn't hang out with them, it would have been on my mind for awhile. But since I was, I was able to have a good time, and get over it in a joyious fashion. Or something like that... Ha.

But, I have to go visit my family, hope things go well. Be around later.

2 comments|post comment

Colonel... [13 Aug 2004|05:29am]
[ mood | chipper ]

I spent the night at Brad's, played some Resident Evil, chatted for abit. Played some Ape Escape..hm, got in the pool/hot tub. I took some pictures of the guys doing crazy stuff. Then we dryed off, went driving, found out Wendy's closed at 2AM...ha, then went back to Brad's and got in the hot tub. We talked for abit and then here I am. We are about to go out to eat. I will update later. I had to make this nice and short because Brad's keyboard sucks. Later

post comment

Sooner or later things will be better. [11 Aug 2004|01:59am]
[ mood | blank ]

I do not understand myself. But I guess that most teenagers do not understand themselves and all that hoohaa. I wish I wern't such a, plain person... Atleast I think I am a plain person. I don't do anything exciting, I don't go places. Mostly because I don't have the money to, and if theres something I wanna do, no one else would wanna do it. Then again, I don't always ask to go do some things.
I've been getting headaches lately... I don't understand why, I rarely get headaches. Its been bothering me some, and made me kinda depressed today because I was trying to think why all of a sudden I have been getting them. I dunno.
Sometimes, I feel like a fool, and I just wanna beat the shit out of myself for what I say, and how I act though. My mindset is skewed, the morals and ethics I try and with-hold and try to follow, not many seem to follow. I feel like a bafoon often,... I dunno where I am going with this besides bashing upon myself.
I think one day, if this modern world doens't suite me, I'm gonna move into the woods. If I can be alone here, I can be alone there.

post comment

Emptiness [10 Aug 2004|04:12am]
[ mood | Here ]

Today, I sat around and watched movies while watching my sister. Then I did chores, and then my dad came home, and I did more chores... Then the guys came and got me, and I went over to Brad's and we played Playstation for abit. Then I came home. Exciting day. I dunno how I feel right now, but I am not in a good mood I guess. Heh

post comment

[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]